Energy vampire
Monday, July 21st, 2008
Q: Masters, I have been a caregiver for my mother for over twenty years. She now has advanced-stage Alzheimer’s and most of the time can’t communicate at all. My own health has deteriorated because I dedicate all my time to her. She does have some lucid moments and is very demanding at that time. She does not like the nursing home that she is in and wants me to take her home to die. I have done this in the past and she always gets better when at home. What am I to do?
A: You must evaluate what is best for you. Your mother has lived a full life and for the last several years has remained in body just because she has been living off your energy. Your dedication is very commendable in the eyes of society but is detrimental to your soul’s search for knowledge.
You mention that after hospitalization or nursing home stays in the past, when she has shamed you into taking her home, she recovers. Have you also tracked the state of your health after each one of these recoveries? If you look back you will see that each time she recovers, you decline. Why? Because she takes your energy to rebuild herself and you are then subject to all sorts of ailments.
Each body has a finite amount of energy unless you are consciously replenishing it from the universe. When other people steal some of your energy for their own use, whether to make them feel better or to repair damage to their own body, it makes you vulnerable to imbalance and disease.
Your pre-planned life lessons included learning to stick up for yourself, deciding if the needs of others were more important than your own, being controlled by the whims of others, and learning to love yourself enough to honor yourself by doing what will help you grow. The situation you outline here shows all of these lessons coming at you at one time.
All the answers lie within your freedom of choice. Is it time to take back your energy from one who has no use for it other than depleting you? Is it time to let your mother, who has completed her mission here, move on and return Home? Only you can make these decisions. Remember, nothing is right or wrong.