Love or sense of security
QUESTION: Masters, I got married under pressure from my parents and now am divorced. I am in love with a boy younger than me and he is less financially stable. I was about to get married but I called off as I feared his finances will not sustain our marriage. My parents are glad that I called it off. Yet I am of 2 minds. What do I do? Please others or trust my decision in marrying him? ~Namrata, India
ANSWER: Your current situation presents three distinct issues to you. First is your need to please others. This comes from relying on your elders as you grew up. People are always wanting others to listen to them and do what they say. It is time to realize that others have no idea what is the best thing for you because they are not living your life. Take responsibility for your own decisions and ignore what anyone else has to say.
Your second problem is not allowing yourself to accept your inner feelings. What comes from inside you is the real you. All those thoughts that you argue about in your head are repeating what has been told to you by others and may not resonate with your energy. Feelings are yours alone; following them permits you to love yourself and what you are doing.
Thirdly, you have convinced yourself that financial security is more important than love. This is a societal belief and has no factual basis. Haven’t you ever seen those who have all the money they could possibly use and yet are unhappy because they have no friends and do nothing but seek after money?
Security itself is an illusion. Having all you want does not ensure that you will be able to maintain that state forever. Financial markets fail, nature destroys your property, loved ones pass over without leaving many assets, and what you thought was giving you security ceases to exist.
As a loving, knowing, magnificent soul, you have all the knowledge to decide what you need in this life to have the experiences you chose. Be concerned only with the moment. The past is gone and the future hasn’t come yet. If you spend too much time worrying about, or planning, your future, you will miss living the present.
The physical age of a body does not give you an indication of the age and experience of the soul. Let your feelings tell you what you share with a potential partner.