Responsibility
QUESTION: Masters, I lead a fairly balanced and happy life. I am now grown up, married with 2 young girls, and work part time as a health practitioner. I have been shown that a part of my being struggles with being fully responsible for my life. I see that many of the children don’t want to take responsibility for their lives (I assume it is because they are not ready), but many of the adults don’t either. What exactly does it mean to be fully responsible for our lives? How much responsibility do I take for the lives of others? When do we as humans reach an age that we could take responsibility for our lives? ~Annick, Australia
ANSWER: Responsibility is something that all humans say they want but few really want at all. Children can’t wait to grow up, adolescents can’t wait to get a driver’s license, students can’t wait to finish school, but then reality sinks in.
When each phase of life is reached it comes with its own responsibilities. Children are no longer waited on hand and foot and have to face the consequences of their decisions. The driver must pay for fuel and insurance and obey a book full of laws in order to drive. Once school is over, the search for employment begins, and then the day-to-day grind of being under someone’s thumb starts.
Responsibility is totally assuming consequences for each and every choice you make in life. For most people it is unthinkable to seek such a task. It is so much better to allow someone else to make decisions for you, because then when things don’t turn out the way you want, it is not your fault but rather theirs.
The process of choosing to give your choices to another is allowing them to have power over you—almost like saying that you trust them to make better decisions than you could because they know more about you than you do yourself. It’s kind of a crazy proposition, but a seemingly safe one when you don’t want to regret what you have done.
The problem with the above process is that you never grow in understanding of life or the lessons you came here to experience. You are just a game piece on the board of life instead of being the player directing the pieces. When are you ready to call the shots? Whenever you start gathering the facts about a situation and making the decisions all on your own. It can be at any stage in the human process that you have enough confidence to make the choices. Sometimes a soul never reaches this stage in a lifetime.