Growing up and apart
QUESTION: Masters, I have a friend who was very close to me for many years and considered her like a sister. Something changed and we no longer talk or see each other. We have never fought or had bad feelings towards one another so I can’t understand what happened? Am I missing something? Now I feel a great distance from her and a sadness at the loss of the friendship, but something inside me tells me to let it go. Maybe something is not right with her? Am I overthinking this or are some relationships meant to play out like this? ~Angie, Canada
ANSWER: Each soul is on their own path throughout their human life. Sometimes it parallels that of another individual, but most often paths just come together for brief periods of shared experiences. When two people have the same intentions for their existence, they become very close since they share goals and possible ways of reaching them.
You and your friend had the same ideas about living at the time of your closeness. Once you began to have varying interests and destinations, the journeys diverged. Most of your old companionship cycled around commonly shared purposes and figuring them out. If you still had things you could talk about, you would. Nothing caused this separation but each of you living a different life. It is time to move on to someone who can share where you are today.
If you live next door to someone or attend a class with another, you are drawn together by the activities those things encompass. When one person moves, you no longer have the neighborhood activity to discuss. When you finish your class, you each go on to something else in which the other has no interest. This is life.
You are overthinking this situation. You would like the happy times to always be there. But just like your first bike with its training wheels: you have outgrown it and must find a more convenient mode of transportation.