Lover and a comfort zone
QUESTION: Masters, I am married for many, many years but have had an affair also for a very long time, 25 years in fact. My husband knows about it and actively encourages us. My lover is also married but unhappily so. Please could you tell me if this scenario is something that we three agreed upon before coming here? Is my lover my soul mate? I feel such a connection with him and we just cannot end our affair. I am happy with my husband the majority of the time, but he is quite controlling. Will I ever spend a life with my lover, just the two of us? ~Joyce, England
ANSWER: All souls have total freedom of choice to choose the situations that create their human experience. Each of you is dealing with your chosen life lessons in different ways. Some of these interconnected activities were discussed before coming to Earth, but just in the way they would allow one to learn something to increase wisdom.
You needed to have a life of examining the various aspects and types of physical love – to see what was for show to other humans and what was fulfilling the soul’s desire for using the physical body’s nervous, skeletal-muscular, emotional, and mental abilities. Outside of the physical body’s animalistic urges to experience orgasms is the psychological and emotional impact these activities with various people have on the one sharing multiple experiences.
Your husband has found many other physical activities that allow him to feel in charge of his area of the world. He wants to preserve the image of having a loving, obedient wife at his beck and call, taking care of him and his wants. He doesn’t want you to leave him, so the fact that your lover is married makes him feel safe in maintaining his “happy home” for the entire world to see. For him it is all about control and the perception he feels the world has of him and his strengths.
Your lover is a soul mate you are assisting to make decisions about his life. You are, however, also facilitating him in not facing the challenges of his home life. He is being forced into remaining with his wife because she desires it. He has a lack of self-esteem and self-worth. You are a safe harbor for him where he feels cherished and appreciated. He does not want to leave his wife because he would then have to take full responsibility for that decision. If things stay as they are, the womenfolk – you and the wife – make all the decisions and he is free to go along for the ride.
What happens in the future is up to each of you and the decisions you choose. Nothing is right or wrong in the realm of spiritual learning. The choices are all up to you.