Time to take responsibility
QUESTION: Masters, I don’t know what kind of lessons I’m supposed to learn here. And special right now, because I have a strong feeling I don’t want to live in Brazil where I was born. I just came back from Europe. Always I come back to Brazil I feel the same sad and hopeless. I’ve got money from my dad to travel again because he could see I was unhappy here. But it didn’t work out. I believed in friends and people in general they can help me and in the end I’m alone. What can I do to go and live in a different country? I feel free when I’m speaking different language and when I’m in different place. And what is the lesson I need to learn with this disappointment with friends and boyfriends? Please help to understand, so I can work on it. ~U, Brazil
ANSWER: It is time to grow up and stop looking for others to take care of you and tell you what to do. Your friends are sick and tired of hearing you complain and resent the fact that you never initiate anything for yourself. You want to think you are a leader and doing your own thing, but you are just riding the wake of others or spending time running from decision-making.
In Brazil you get the feeling that you are required to mature, get a job, and start taking care of yourself, and you don’t want to. So you simply run away yet again. You are spoiled, and your father is helping to facilitate your dependency because he gives you whatever you want while making few, or no, demands on you. He would rather have you someplace else than in his face when you are being your unhappy, sad self.
You are not going to be happy anywhere until you decide what you want for the future. You are aimlessly drifting because you have no idea what you even like. Have you ever considered where you will be in five years, or ten years? You are not a child any longer; stop trying to take the benefits of one.
You could go and live in another country, but you would have to have some way to make money. Decide what you want to do with your life and then get the education or experience to make it so. The major lesson here is that you, and you alone, are responsible for your life. You can’t depend on others to make you understand about freedom of choice and creating your own reality.
Once you have a career or experience in the job market, then you will be able to move anywhere you want. Brazil will even appear different to you.