How much is too much?
QUESTION: Masters, I have a friend who has many challenges in her life, mostly revolving around her children, her money, and her cats. In the last four years or so, I have helped financially, definitely more than I should have, and now I am trying just to help with transportation, moral support, and love. However, she just keeps getting in deeper. I’m working on my own spiritual path and am trying to see this from a soul level. Many of the answers you have sent recently have helped me, but I’m at the point where I could use a little feedback as to my involvement in her life. I love her dearly and want to help in the best way for both of us. ~Connie, USA
ANSWER: Humans have a need to be accepted and to do what they think society wants of them. This generally puts them into situations where they give, give, give always to others without a whole lot of thought about themselves. A scenario like this one allows some who are the recipients to avoid having to take responsibility for their own actions. They merrily go their reckless way while others come along and pick up the pieces strewn in their wake.
Your friend and her children chose each other knowing the characteristics each would have. When you step in, thinking that you are rescuing the children, you are enabling the mother. She never thinks out the consequences of her actions because someone will come and bail her out, or at least keep her afloat. The only way for her to get the picture is to sink on her own and find a way to come back to the surface. The children are observing how their mother behaves and are taking notes for later in their lives.
During the time you have been working to know your true self, you have realized some of the actions taking place. Each soul is responsible for learning the lessons it predetermined to experience. Each person must come to his or her own realization about those lessons, and really can’t do that unless the facts are faced. It is a lesson for you to decide how to handle the situation from here on out.
Honor the lessons she has set up. Send your best intentions to her for an easy resolution. She is going to have to take some tumbles before she can see what others have been keeping her from tackling.