Archive for January, 2013

Not acting like friends

Tuesday, January 22nd, 2013

QUESTION: Masters, I’ve been having a problem with my Wiccan friends. They always go into the spirit realm when we’re hanging out, but I can’t even figure out how to find my door. They say my soul’s too young to even take part in it, so what should I do? I would ask other people who know about Wicca, but I don’t know any other Wiccans, and it always makes me feel like I’m not wanted when they’re talking about it, because they want me to be quiet, but I don’t know what they’re talking about and I can’t help but ask. ~Veronica, USA

ANSWER: Your friends have created their own definition of Wicca. They pretend a lot, saying they are doing things when they really aren’t. Most of their conversation while they are in the “spirit realm” is imagination or made up. To get familiar with Wiccan practices throughout the world, purchase some of the standard books on Wicca or see if the local library has the historical volumes.

No big secret—entering into a realm other than the physical just takes practice. It can be done through your intention with repetition. Begin with learning to meditate to the degree in which you cut off your own thoughts and leave yourself open to hearing and participating with the non-physicals. A first step is also sensitizing yourself to the natural energies around you. Hug a tree and feel its life flow. Place your hand on the Earth and feel the tempo of life.

Your soul is not so young that it can’t open to the universal flow of life-force energy. Something that can help you is learning about Reiki energy transfer. You may want to take a class or just be in the presence of Reiki practitioners. This will allow you to see what energy flow feels like to your human body; everyone perceives it differently.

Your friends are having fun at your expense. They want to find some way to feel superior to you, and they have chosen this way of denigrating and making you feel left out. True friends would not do this. True friends would work with you to help you advance and understand. It is possible to practice Wicca without being part of a coven. If this is the practice you seek, give it a go on your own.

Competing with disturbances

Tuesday, January 22nd, 2013

QUESTION: Masters, right now at this important moment we should be focusing on ourselves, sleeping well and quietly, I am finding myself in an ironic situation. A few days ago there was a deposit of building materials behind my house; now there is annoying noise all day, whistles and the sound of the engine forklifts incessantly from 5:30 in the morning. It has harmed my sleep and my readings and meditations even while using ear protection. I’m worried about losing this incredible chance from being tired and not being able to release that anger about it, or meditating and practicing all the exercises I have learned to this point because it requires a calm environment. I fear that this noise never ends and I have to live with my mother, I did not want to because she has problems with OCD, acquaintanceship is terrible and she will not seek aid. ~Bárbara Louise, Brazil

ANSWER: You have tied yourself up in knots. You are like the strings on a fine instrument—pluck the string and it vibrates for a long time before it is finished giving off sounds and can do nothing else until the vibration stops. Lighten up! Stop setting conditions for your world. Learn to integrate the world around you into your world. It is not necessary to be in a vacuum in order to get in touch with your inner self or to communicate with us. You are going to have to share the world with others. They will not let you impose your standards and requirements upon them, so you need to learn to ignore their processes.

To shut off the distractions you need to go inside. When you pay attention to the noise, you are giving it power and strength to interfere with your life. Start by concentrating on your breathing. Hear/feel the air coming into your body, washing away the debris from your body and then rushing out with all the toxins. If you feel the process, the background noise and all distractions will begin to disappear—unless you won’t let them by constantly trying to hear how loud they are. Every bit of concentration directed toward the noise intensifies it.

When you want to sleep, hum a favorite tune, allowing it to get louder and louder in your head until that is all you can hear. Hitch a ride on the melody and go floating off into rest and relaxation. Turn down the construction noise while you turn up your internal tempo.

In an attempt to control your environment, you have envisioned the worst possible scenario: having to go live with your mother. This brings you back to your youth where she was whom you had to run to when life was not working as you wanted. Now she is a symbol of failure to you. Stop being a victim. Create in your mind the background you desire. You have been concentrating on the annoying noise; now supplant that with your own sounds.

Allowing yourself to be used

Tuesday, January 22nd, 2013

QUESTION: Masters, my question is about a man that’s been in my life on and off for 2.5 years. When our romance started, it surprised me totally, since I hadn’t imagined that we could ever end up together. Our relationship is very complicated not only because we don’t live in the same country and we’ve got almost 20 years of age difference but because this man, who I sometimes call the love of my life, has a partner and a family. He is not willing to leave them. I ended our relationship (again) 4 months ago but am now apparently suffering memory loss and am about to welcome him back in my life. I love him but at the same time I feel incredibly vulnerable and uncertain whether I can trust that he won’t just end up hurting me even though I know he does not want to. What should I do? ~A-M.H.A, Spain

ANSWER: You need to be loved. You don’t care about or love yourself enough to be happy so you seek satisfaction elsewhere. It is easy to love from a distance. When you are not constantly confronted by a partner, only the positive aspects, the times you can be together, are remembered. You are a toy for this man. You are there waiting when he chooses to look your way.

Stop subjecting yourself to this abuse. You are a puppet on a string, a puppy who comes whenever called because you want the treat he is dangling: a period of physical attention and love. It is fleeting and then he is off to his “regular” life and you are sent home to your dog house to wait for the next time you are summoned.

You like safety, and he can be the love of your life because he is bigger than life in your imagination and dreams without making outrageous demands of you or your time. He will never leave his family. He uses you but feels all right about it because you don’t complain and always come back. Stop kidding yourself; it will never be anything more than it is right now. You deserve much more than this. Why do you leave yourself tied up to him and out of the market for a normal, sharing relationship?

Take back your power, the power to create a relationship that will include a full-time boyfriend who loves you unconditionally, not just when it is convenient for him. You are in love with the idea of love but you have not really experienced it. Love is not part time or conditional. Love yourself, know there is much more out there for you, and move on.