Archive for October, 2010

Controlled by pornography

Tuesday, October 12th, 2010

QUESTION: Masters, pornography has destroyed my ability to find a loving relationship. My whole being has always been devoted to addressing injustice in a harmonious way. I tried praying and managed to stop for five months. But in that time I surrendered completely realizing that justice was administered by God only. I lost all drive and felt everything was worthless. Obviously what I was missing was love, but now I doubt whether I even know what that is. I have returned to pornography to ease the despair, but this is not what I really want. Can you help? ~Anonymous, UK

ANSWER: Let’s get the bullshit out of the way and take a good look at your situation. You put your proclivity down to injustice, and to what did you surrender during the five months you had control of yourself? You certainly seem to function only in fear and the lack of love of self. Let’s break down what you have said.

You have devoted yourself to “addressing injustice in a harmonious way.” The concept of judgment is a product of the human ego that assigns a degree of rightness or wrongness to every act that takes place in physical form. To address injustice you have to step in and be judge and jury over everything you see. That is to say, you and you alone can determine what is right and wrong for other people. This is an impossible activity because everybody has freedom to do what they choose. Unless you have the consent of each person, you cannot change their actions. You have therefore been fooling yourself that you have had an effect on “injustice”—whatever that is, anyway. That will make you feel worthless.

“Surrendered completely” to what? Did you accept the knowledge that you couldn’t affect things, as discussed above? Your ideas about God (a judgmental force outside of yourself) are important only for their influence over whatever freedom of choice you accept as having in your lifetime. To take charge of your life, look at yourself and get rid of even the tiniest degree of judgment. Instead, start evaluating the world around you. Start accepting responsibility for your own actions. Someone outside of you cannot make choices for you that will feel good to you.

What should you evaluate? Decide whether you like what you are doing or not. Don’t spend any time at all thinking about what anyone else thinks of your activities. You are the only important person in your life. How you feel and think about your life determines the quality of your life. Pornography is a lesson with which you have chosen to deal.

Love is first accepting yourself exactly as you are—not necessarily liking everything you do but accepting your desire to do it. Then love is using your freedom of choice to change your behavior into something that feels appropriate for you, or accepting that you do not wish to change. Don’t blame your lack of making your own decisions on some outside source not causing you to change. Only you control you.

Cheating husband

Tuesday, October 12th, 2010

QUESTION: Masters, my husband has been cheating on me for the past several years, but I got to know about this only three years back. Since I have two kids, I did not leave my husband primarily because of my kids. This made my husband bold and shameless, saying that he would continue sleeping with women and have relationships with them and it is up to me to live with or leave him. I want to leave him but am scared of being a single mom and worried about my children. What if something happened to me—then who will look after them? Please guide me what should I do? ~Hansa, India

ANSWER: Choose to take control of your life. You are letting your husband and your fears hold you hostage. You are an extremely strong person but you don’t accept that. You would easily be able to manage without your cheating husband as a millstone around your neck. He doesn’t care for you, likes the idea of holding you hostage because of your fear of being able to survive without him, and will only get more brazen as time goes on.

Why do you even have the thought that something might happen to you? That is just another excuse you are putting in the way of leaving him. Nothing is going to happen to you just because you are on your own. You will find a support system of family and friends who will be there for you and the children.

Nothing is right or wrong in the journey of the soul. If you choose to remain in your situation, you must learn from the emotional abuse to which you are being subjected. You do not deserve to be treated as you are, but the abuse will continue until you say no more and walk out. The choice is yours.

Confusion, which way is right

Tuesday, October 12th, 2010

QUESTION: Masters, I love to groom dogs and have done so for years, but since I have discovered my healing gifts, every time that I think about going back to my old love of grooming I get an extreme pain in my right shoulder. I have thought about going to nursing school because it more ties in with my spiritual gifts. I did Reiki on dogs and that is where I found my gifts. I feel like I am standing in the fork of the road. Please point me in the right direction. ~Annette, USA

ANSWER: We can’t tell you what you should do because that would interfere with your freedom of choice. What we can tell you is that your body is receiving signals from your higher self trying to tell you to get off the starting line and move ahead. The right side of the body reflects the forward movement in life. If it gets painful when you think about something but don’t act upon those thoughts, you are telling yourself decision time is now.

To be a healer such as a Reiki practitioner you don’t have to have a nursing degree or something of that nature to be able to use the power. You already know you have a connection with animals and that you can do more than just groom them. To be able to soothe them and take away some pain and fear with Reiki energy is a very important service to pets and their owners.

Are you aware that as you bring through the energy to help animals, the energy also balances up your own body as it travels through? Your body likes that energy, and your shoulder is asking for you to at least continue bringing the energy through so it can feel better. There are a lot of spiritual healers who are channeling energy through from the universe to Mother Earth at this time to stop the destructive forces that are currently affecting it.

It is time to go inside and see what feels like the direction you can relate to best. Don’t think about things without acting—just go with your feelings.